“Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.” Psalm 139:16
I’m a writer. I have a ‘book’. To see my life put into these terms is so fun for me because I get it. I can see God opening a giant Moleskine, pulling out a ridiculously cool pen, and beginning to scribble down the details of the character that would be me. I can see Him afterwords speaking these words and as they fall off of His lips, I begin to be knitted together piece by piece.
When I write, I take a while and jot down different pieces of what I want to include. Every piece of poetry and every blog has a different feel. I’ll write down a piece here and there and then come back to it when I have more. Eventually all the pieces fit together just write and I know it’s right- it is finished. When it is finished I have a book that I copy it down into. When it’s gone into that book, it’s ready to be displayed and shared with the world. Every finished piece was formed and written before it existed as it is now known.
Our very days were formed for us before we ourselves were formed. He gazed upon our unformed substance (whatever that means) and thought over what our life would entail. He thought through what characteristics we would have, what events would take place and how that would shape us, who we would cross paths with, what we would accomplish. He formed our days, He numbered them, and He gave them to us. Not one extra day will be added, not one taken away.
Some may take this in an offensive way. There are a hundred questions this could stir up. The fact that my days were formed for me and written into His book before I existed brings me much comfort for two reasons:
1) I’m not in control. Maybe you’re a control freak (I struggle not to be). But the thing I have to remind myself is that the more control I have, the more I have to worry about. Think about it. The more responsibility you have, the more things you are in sole control over, the more you have to hang on to and grapple with. The more you are at risk of losing control of. The more potential chaos and destruction. To know that my days were laid out and handed to me and that yes, I have decisions to make, but ultimately it’s not in my hands…that brings me so much peace.
2) There is an incredible sense of purpose to my life. Now, I don’t always know the details of that purpose. But if you are like me, there are days were it seems like life is pointless. At times it feels like I have no purpose, like I am not needed, like…honestly, I’m really screwed up and I’m the only person on the planet that has no idea what they are doing. These words bring everything back into focus- my days were formed. I have been allotted a specific span of time in which I will exist, and it was not an accident that I was created, but an intentionally planned thing. I have a purpose, my purpose was set into place before I was set into place, and it has all been written out into His book. Nothing but the very hand of God can alter these things.
Knowing that your days were formed, knowing that your days have been written into the very book of God, how does that change the way you see yourself? How does that bring a sense of purpose into your life? What steps can you take to live in a way that will more reflect these things?